It reminds me of when I was a kid playing in the oil fields of eastern Texas. We figured out we could get mercury out of the oil field equipment...so being typical kids...we spent a week riding our bicycles from meter to meter draining mercury, until we had a full gallon milk jug full. (I am incriminating myself as I figure the statute of limitation is up on our petty vandalism...I hope!?!). Anyway, we were having a blast playing with all that mercury, until an older friend told us we were probably killing ourselves. We got scared and put the whole gallon hidden up in the barn.
Skip ahead 20 years to our Father selling the farm. He came across the mercury. We fessed up where it came from (I was flying in the Air Force and figured I was past a good whooping). He started by calling Exxon, the owner of the oil field, but they were way past using mercury and wanted nothing to do with it. Next he called the EPA, since he figured they would know what to do. They told him they would charge him to come get it, and then charge him an annual storage fee until eternity to keep it.
Dad was much sharper than these DC egg heads. Calling their bluff he simply responded, “thank you, but I won’t be needing your help. I’ll just go dump it in the ditch out front.” That changed the smug EPA attitude right away. Within 2 hours they showed up in full chemical gear, took the gallon away and Dad never heard back.