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Another blonde joke
- Thread starter maynard
- Start date
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share this one instead
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy-efficient kind.
Yesterday, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the windows had been installed a whole year ago, and I hadn't paid for them yet.
Now just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So I told him just exactly what his fast-talking sales guy had told ME last year..namely, that in just ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!
Helllooooo'! ! (I told him). 'It's been a year'!
There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He hasn't called back, probably too embarrassed about forgetting the guarantee they made me.
Bet he won't underestimate my intelligence again.
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy-efficient kind.
Yesterday, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the windows had been installed a whole year ago, and I hadn't paid for them yet.
Now just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So I told him just exactly what his fast-talking sales guy had told ME last year..namely, that in just ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!
Helllooooo'! ! (I told him). 'It's been a year'!
There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He hasn't called back, probably too embarrassed about forgetting the guarantee they made me.
Bet he won't underestimate my intelligence again.
equiprx
Luke Skywalker
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I like that one.
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Brilliant
mikephillips
Yoda
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Used to work with a blonde woman who was a friend, she loved collecting blonde jokes. She loved pranks too. So this isn't really a blonde joke, but one year for her birthday I sent a big bunch of balloons to the office she was in, pink and blue balloons with a big silver one that said "congratulations". The card said "Happy birthday, but guess what everyone else thinks"... Got a call from her later that date, did I got hollered at!! Said that it seems every other woman in the place was coming by asking of she and her husband wanted a boy or girl, when due and so on. I was laughing so hard I was crying and ended with best $20 bucks I'd ever spent as a reply. Took a couple days but she finally said that it was pretty funny and I'd gotten her back for the jokes pulled on me over the years.
Silverghost
Yoda
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Blonde starlet gets on the plane, sits in first class. "I'm going to LA to be a big star!" Flight attendant looks at her ticket and says "Ma'am, your ticket is in coach - you have to move." Blonde says "I'm going to LA to be a big star!". Flight attendant says "Ma'am, your ticket is in coach - you have to move." Again, the blonde says "I'm going to LA to be a big star!" Flight attendant goes to the cockpit, explains the situation to the pilot. Pilot walks back to the blonde starlet, whispers to her, and the blonde says "Well, why didn't you say so!" and goes to her seat in coach. Flight attendant asks the pilot what she said. Pilot responds "I told her first class isn't going to LA."
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Gliderman8
Great Pumpkin
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Here's my favorite...
A blonde was driving during a bad thunderstorm. As she approached the bridge there was a sign saying the "bridge was out". Not knowing what to do, she pulls over and gets out of her car. As she peered across the river, she sees another blonde so she shouts "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde shouts back "You are on the other side"
A blonde was driving during a bad thunderstorm. As she approached the bridge there was a sign saying the "bridge was out". Not knowing what to do, she pulls over and gets out of her car. As she peered across the river, she sees another blonde so she shouts "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde shouts back "You are on the other side"
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In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.
Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain. $200 for a female brain."
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.
A little girl, unable to control her curiosity, blurted out, "Why is the women's brain so much cheaper?"
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained, "Because they are used."
Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain. $200 for a female brain."
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.
A little girl, unable to control her curiosity, blurted out, "Why is the women's brain so much cheaper?"
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained, "Because they are used."
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Always keep your friends close, your enemies closer!
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You have to sleep sometime. And I'll bet she knows where all the sharp kitchen utensils are.
Gliderman8
Great Pumpkin
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We can’t win…
mikephillips
Yoda
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Did you hear about the blond who was surprised that she could listen to an AM radio in the afternoon?
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